The Mantuary

BUY MANTUARY GEAR!

Kobe Bryant, Elliot Spitzer, John Edwards, whoever… I want to castrate every last one of these two faced bastards who cheat on their wives. Why the hell is it so difficult for guys to commit to a marriage? If you need your “flavor of the week” or you can’t keep your dumb ass out of the Champagne room or you’re simply afraid of committing to one woman for the rest of your life, then I got a revelation for ya… don’t get f’n married!

I’ll be the first to admit marriage is not easy. I’d be lying if I told you I was the perfect husband… hell, no one is perfect.  But when these egocentric scumbags destroy their family’s lives for a cheap thrill is when I have zero tolerance.  Like my grandfather once told me, “if ya wanna stay out of trouble, keep your pecker in your pants”. 

And when you inevitable do screw up as a married man, keep yourself in check… some flowers can easily make up for a late night out with the guys… a day at the spa for the Hen can fix just about any motherhood induced stress… but throw your hot dog down your intern’s hallway and there’s no gift shop in the world that can get you out of that mess.  Break the “look but do not touch” rule and you’re anything but a man in my book.

I made it about 14 seconds into this clip before I dropkicked my computer monitor.

I guess all rendezvous don’t turn out terrible…

Both of you scumbags need to…

Be A Man

-The Founding Father

 

Filed under: Rants