The Mantuary

BUY MANTUARY GEAR!

Every Mantuary tells a story.  From what is hung on the walls to the seating you provide your fellow Man, your Mantuary defines who you are.  This year, why not give the gift of marginally comfortable seating with a style only a Man could love.  Stadium seating by The Irwin Seating Company is perfect for any Mantuary.  With many colors and styles to choose from, there is certainly a chair for everyone. 

Here are my reviews and recommendations:

The Senator:  If you’re a Man who cares more about the number of guys you can cram into your Mantuary to watch the big fight rather than worry about the comfort level of your guests, this is the seat for you (as it should be).  Kick it, spit on it, beat it with a stick, this chair is made to last.  Made of double wall, blow mold polyethylene, this super strength chair will laugh at the drunken fools who try to break it.  It features a nostalgic, slat-back design ergonomically designed for the marginal comfort every Man requires.  You can even have your Senator customized with logos and cupholders.  Ugly enough to keep the hen away, yet perfectly functional for any Man, The Senator is my #1 pick for Mantuary stadium seating.

The Citation:  The Citation is made of one-piece, injection molded, high-impact HDPE polyethylene.  You’ll be getting a bit more comfort with the standard poly foam thickness of 2″ (optional 3″ is also available).  These seats are available with either cast iron or steel mountings.  If you’ve turned your Mantuary into a sports shrine, a set of these with a custom print of your favorite baseball or football team would be f’n sweet. PROCEED WITH CAUTION: these chairs are fast approaching a woman’s definition of acceptable seating, and if you’re not careful, the hen may try to sneak in for a Lifetime movie marathon every now and again. NOTE: along with marginally comfortable seating (see The Senator review above), keeping your Mantuary at a cool 69 degrees or below can also be a useful deterrent for this type of behavior. 

The VIP:  I actually hate this chair because I am married.  There is not a married guy in the world that could pull a set of these off and still maintain a space that is exclusively his own, which is the definition of any true Mantuary worth talking about.  I guarantee if you put a set of these in your Mantuary it’s only a matter of time until the hen uses them as an excuse to throw a Southern Home Fleecing party followed by a showing of ‘The Notebook’ while serving veggie crudites to all her gossipy friends in your “man cave”.  That said, if you’re still a bachelor or recently widowed, this is the seat for you.  This chair utilizes Signature back technology, it has center, flip-up arms with integral cupholders, large snack trays on the aisle ends and a stationary seat with 3″ foam.  Upholstery customization and a full range of accessories are available.

Be A Man.

-The Founding Father

 

Filed under: Baseball, Football, Seasonal, Sports & Leisure, Stuff You Should Own