Man Math 101: Your Golf Score
I’m hitting the links this weekend for the first time this season and was reminded of an inquiry I received earlier this winter. Seems like the perfect time to use Man Math to answer this age old question…
Q: Dear Founding Father-
How can Man Math account for a Mans true golf score?
A: This is actually a lot more simple than it may seem. First, you need count the number of cheating characteristics a golfer has. In any given round count up the number of times you can say “yes” if the golfer in question:
is competitive- is golfing for money
- is playing in a scramble
- is playing against co-workers
- curses
- is drinking on the course
- has a driver that costs over $300 yet can only hit fairways 25% of the time
- kicks the ball
- ever says, “go ahead guys, i’ll catch up”
- is playing with college buddies
- is playing with a woman
- is in the vicinity of a woman
- sees a woman at the turn
- talks on his cell phone
- tells you he’s usually not this bad
tells you he’s having an off day- fails to hit his drive past the ladies tee
- insists on “keeping score”
- wears jeans on the course
- brings a beer onto the green with him
- says “that’s good” to any put greater than 1 foot
- fluffs the ball
Add 1 stroke for every cheating characteristic the golfer has and you have his real score.
My best round? I once shot an 81 just a few days after getting a new Taylor Made driver playing with a couple college buddies I used to play football with at an open bar scramble that had scantily clad cheerleaders on the money holes and at the turn.
Be A Man.
-The Founding Father
Filed under: Beer, Chicks, Cigars, Golfing, Man Math 101, Sports & Leisure
